The idea of heading to Africa came to me at the beginning of 2009.  But now that I have an official placement with Kiva, $400 of vaccines flowing through my veins, and my resignation letter handed in, all the feelings that I have accumulated along this process have intensified. Where I was once hesitant, I am now scared. Where I was once excited, I am now ecstatic. And where I was once pleased I took the initiative, I am now proud I am following through. 

This got me thinking about accomplishments and whether they can be defined not only by the attainment of a goal, but by the dismissal of one as well.  Instead of constructing dreams and hopes, can we also take pride in deconstructing paradigms?

We often see things not as they are, but as we are conditioned to see them.  Having always known a limited definition of success, I often failed to recognize the various achievements of others and sadly restricted my own possibilities. Even though my life is a patchwork of geographically diverse experiences, I have had a narrow and stale take on what one should aspire to become. 

And as I attempt to “uncondition” myself, I realize that I may never fully escape the trappings of Wall St.  But I am unabashed to say that I am proud to be parting with a job I had once put on a pedestal.

Sometimes the greatest accomplishments in life have nothing to do with attainment.  Sometimes they have everything to do with letting go.